Pete Hegseth (R, Hooters Happy Hour) Spells Climate Disaster as DOD Chief

I haven’t posted here in quite some time. In my defense, Donald Trump is about to be sworn in for his second blood-curdling turn at being the “leader of the free world,” and I have been paralyzed by… what? Dread? Horror? Despair?

I don’t get depressed (if anything, I suffer from an opposite and equally maladaptive condition). I am fairly sanguine - a “glass ¾ full person,” if you will. I am a very well educated white woman in late middle age, past my childbearing years, with a support system, a trickle of money coming in, and relatively small personal stakes in what will be coming down the pike. If the GOP yanks away Social Security and Medicare, then yes, I am pretty f**ked - but even then, I’ve got a bolthole where life could be extremely cheap, I could grow food, have chickens… In short, I am lucky. Damned lucky. I know it and acknowledge it every single day.

I am also alive, however, with probably 3 decades left in this mortal coil, as humanity races faster and faster into the whirling vortex of the climate crisis. When Kamala Harris was not elected, it hit me VERY hard that America’s last hope of doing anything about this polycrisis might just have been voted away by the MAGA horde and those independents who did not do even the barest research about the coarse simulacrum of humanity they were elevating to the presidency.

So, yeah. I’ve been a little paralyzed by malaise, and unable to figure out what even to say, really, about how we proceed in the United States with a “drill baby drill” administration at the helm of the ship of state, champing at the bit to buy bloody Greenland, for crying out loud!

But, to quote John Cleese in the witch burning scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail, “I got better.” There wasn’t any other choice, really. One must live to fight another day, I reasoned, and so I am putting pen to paper, dear reader, to report on how ABSOLUTELY BLOODY HORRIFYING it is that Pete Hegseth (R, Fox News) is likely to be confirmed as the next Secretary of Defense.

I watched his confirmation hearing in its entirety. I wasn’t sure my blood pressure would stay under control while listening to him snarl and lie and bloviate - but even I, with my low expectations, was surprised by just how insane the whole thing was, how stridently anti-woke and anti-DEI, and how much like a revival meeting it seemed at times. I mean, did you hear Tommy Tuberville’s line of “questioning?” He might as well have been actually thumping a Bible while he declaimed his lines.

Erik Schmitt (R, MO), distilled the whole tone when he groveled, “Thank you for your clarity in articulating the vision you have for the Department of Defense and restoring ethos—a warrior ethos, which is in stark contrast to the ethos we have seen the last four years: weakness and wokeness.”

And of course in addition to quite a bit of god-bothering (I’m always struck by the thought that god is perfectly capable of making up their own mind about things, without a lot of bothering from us humans), there was repetitive and wearying rhetoric about “left wing woke universities” and the “warrior culture” Hegseth wants to reinstill, as well as many MANY repetitions of the rather chilling appellation “war fighter,” which I can only assume was giving a nice warm chubby to every Senator who repeated it (as well as to Hegseth himself).

Despite a strong showing by the Democrats - who mostly really did seem to be fired up and ready to go - if anyone out there was thinking, “This pathetically underqualified, rape-y drunk can’t possibly be confirmed, especially since he’s obviously either piss-poor with money or actively skimming off the top,” well, you’re probably not thinking that any longer. The GOP is fully in the tank for Hegseth. The Democrats showed up with some excellent points, reasoned logic, and clever, impassioned gotchas, but they’re outnumbered and no one on the other side is defecting. Joni Ernst may have been the last best hope for a GOP “no” vote, based on Hegseth’s on-the-record crap about women in combat positions - but it seems that Joni is now on board, too, so…

But I honestly wasn’t really there for the culture wars nonsense. I was mostly intently listening for what Hegseth (R, Moe’s Happy Hour) would say about climate change.

The US military, while overrun by right wingers and conservatives of all stripes, has surprisingly been decidedly forceful about the subject. I cannot imagine that a “woke mob” of Bernies and AOCs are coming up with climate policy in our military. These are not wild-eyed radicals we’re dealing with. Instead, there appears to remain a reality-based community inside the Pentagon.

Military operations are directly threatened by many conditions caused or exacerbated by the changing climate - including sea level rise, super storms, drought and its concomitant sequelae of famine and mass migration, and the like. The military needs to be realistic and clear-eyed about the threats. And, to their collective credit, they seem to be just that.

Here’s the full text of the Army War College’s extremely alarming and clear-eyed report from 2019.

And here’s a press release from 2022, for a flavor of their conclusions:

US Army releases its Climate Strategy By Army Public Affairs 10 February 2022

WASHINGTON — The U.S. Army announces the release of its first Climate Strategy that guides decision making in response to threats from climate that affect installation and unit sustainability, readiness, and resilience. The strategy directs how the Army will maintain its strategic advantage through deliberate efforts to reduce future climate impacts and risks to readiness and national security.

Experts have shown that climate change increases worldwide drought and insecurity, which places demands on fragile states and contributes to food scarcity, migration, and security concerns, and threatens U.S. national security interests and defense objectives. As a guide for future decisions, this strategy is the next step in the Army’s decades-long effort to combat climate change in support of national security interests.

"The time to address climate change is now. The effects of climate change have taken a toll on supply chains, damaged our infrastructure, and increased risks to Army Soldiers and families due to natural disasters and extreme weather,” said Secretary of the Army, Christine Wormuth. “The Army must adapt across our entire enterprise and purposefully pursue greenhouse gas mitigation strategies to reduce climate risks. If we do not take action now, across our installations, acquisition and logistics, and training, our options to mitigate these risks will become more constrained with each passing year."

The Army developed its Climate Strategy as a roadmap of actions that will enhance unit and installation readiness and resilience in the face of climate-related threats. Changing climate conditions requires the Army to meet new operational challenges, expand disaster response missions, and address risks to our people and lands.

These Army-wide efforts include enhancing resilience and sustainability on our installations, reducing sustainment demand, and preparing a climate-ready force with the appropriate knowledge, skills, concepts, and plans necessary to operate in a climate-altered world.

The Army will remain the dominant land fighting force by adapting to changing global conditions including climate change. This strategy will position our installations and supply chains to better withstand extreme weather, improve our training relevancy to a changing world, and our Soldiers will fulfill their missions under the harshest conditions.

It is therefore mind blowing - while being completely unsurprising - that Hegseth (R, Climate Denial) would respond as follows to a direct question about climate change:

Senator Dan Sullivan (R, Alaska): Mr. Hegseth, if your secretary of the Navy ends up focusing on climate change more than shipbuilding and lethality, will you commit to me to fire him?

Pete Hegseth (R, Moe’s Bar ‘n’ Grill): My secretary of the Navy, should I be confirmed, sir, will not be focused on climate change in the Navy. Just like the secretary of the Air Force will not be focused on LG-powered fighter jets or the secretary of the Army will not be focused on electric-powered tanks.

I’m not sure what to say about that. There is an absolutely gaping chasm between reality - reality so terrifying that even a bunch of uniformed GOP voters have no choice but to acknowledge it - and the GOP’s political stance.

So let me address Mr. Hegseth directly, here.

Pete. My dude. Want another couple fingers of Jack? Cool - cool. I know you’re cutting down.

So, what’s up with this climate change denial? You do know that naval bases are SINKING beneath the waves, right? Dealing with that shit is gonna cost money - maybe as much as $387 billion - a lot more than the money you lost running those penny ante pretend military-adjacent companies you fleeced. You’ll be in charge of the military budget soon. How’s it going to look if you just ignore the need for infrastructure hardening and let shit drown? I’m betting the Big Man won’t be happy about that.

And those “war fighters” overseas? The ones you think need “less woke” and “more lethality?” How the hell are they gonna deal with hundreds of thousands of starving brown people trying to flood north into Europe and potentially over to the “homeland” when crops fail in Jordan and Sudan and Niger? There are gonna be RIOTS, man. Riots. Civil unrest? Hah. Try civil war - and not just in one theatre, either - all over the f**king place. I can’t see the DOD staying out of that kind of mess. Can you?

Did you see what happened in Spain after the crazy flooding last fall? People freaked out, not gonna lie. They were in the streets howling for the heads of the government officials who DID NOT SAVE THEM. That’s coming here soon, my dude. What do you get when you add runaway climate change to soaring income inequality and screaming high prices because your bro Donald is imposing tariffs all over the damned place? A shitshow is what you get. An epic shitshow.

Now I suppose you think you got yourself covered. I mean, you didn’t commit to refusing an unlawful order from The Donald, so maybe you think you can call out the military on US citizens if we start wilding out over little things like uncontrolled wildfires, killer hurricanes, crushing drought, and food shortages. Cool, cool. It’s all starting to make sense.

I hope you’re not offended if I tell you that I think you’re woefully unqualified for the job, and will be an unmitigated disaster from Day One. Why would you be offended, or even take notice? Who am I, after all? A libtard nobody who doesn’t understand power and prestige, amirite?

On a personal level, I suppose I wish you well, because - that’s our jam. Democrats, liberals, progressives… we tend to feel like everyone deserves their best life and should get a fair shake. But when I think about how the United States is going to handle the challenges of climate change over the next four years, my blood runs COLD. If there were a level below “does not get it and does not care” I would assign you to 3,000 levels below that. You’re an arrogant blowhard ignoramus, and I am embarrassed for my country that you somehow rose to the point where you’re actually going to be in charge of the entire DOD.

But you do you, my man. And me? I will do me. Which is to fight you and your denialist ilk tooth and nail for as long as it takes, wherever it takes. EXPECT US. And enjoy another drink on your way out. If you’re not lying, it will be among your last before you assume the mantle of Secretary of Defense, the FSM help us.

Remember:

• Asking did not work.

• Voting did not work.

• Marching did not work.

• Emissions keep going up.

• Our leaders have failed us.

#ClimateRevolution NOW.